Nothing more to be said
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Creative Souls :: Writing :: Poetry
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Nothing more to be said
M&F - Kind of mature...and for fantasy, it mentions faeries.
Dragging her wrist across the knife
Removing the pain of her worthless life,
A lovely collage of skin, tears, and red
A flash of the memory of what had been said
Removing the pain for just a short while
While throwing herself into deeper exile
But even that just can’t sustain
The greatness, the weight, of all her pain
She tells herself it simply doesn’t matter
But she misses it, the love, the happiness, the flatter
She cries out to herself, into her bed
But self animosity keeps visiting her head
“Am I a mistake?” she thinks, this helpless thought
And it’s obvious her suicidal thoughts can’t be fought
She tries, she tries, but she just can’t win
Telling herself no then recommitting the sin
Falling so hard for someone once more,
Love must just be something of faeries and folklore
She then knows she’s not meant to find love,
It’s written from the dirt in her vains to the skies above
This is it, she decides; now is the time
She carves “sans amour” into the wall
Never has there been such an undeserved shrine
She finds and hangs a long, black old worn thread
She ties a knot, and in it she places her weeping head
There she leaves us now; with nothing more to be said
Dragging her wrist across the knife
Removing the pain of her worthless life,
A lovely collage of skin, tears, and red
A flash of the memory of what had been said
Removing the pain for just a short while
While throwing herself into deeper exile
But even that just can’t sustain
The greatness, the weight, of all her pain
She tells herself it simply doesn’t matter
But she misses it, the love, the happiness, the flatter
She cries out to herself, into her bed
But self animosity keeps visiting her head
“Am I a mistake?” she thinks, this helpless thought
And it’s obvious her suicidal thoughts can’t be fought
She tries, she tries, but she just can’t win
Telling herself no then recommitting the sin
Falling so hard for someone once more,
Love must just be something of faeries and folklore
She then knows she’s not meant to find love,
It’s written from the dirt in her vains to the skies above
This is it, she decides; now is the time
She carves “sans amour” into the wall
Never has there been such an undeserved shrine
She finds and hangs a long, black old worn thread
She ties a knot, and in it she places her weeping head
There she leaves us now; with nothing more to be said
Last edited by BellatrixMalfoy on Sun 08 May 2011, 1:33 pm; edited 1 time in total
BellatrixMalfoy- Novice 1
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Re: Nothing more to be said
... *Is speechless* That was terribly sad, but beautifully written...
Tolly12bells- Rising Star 2
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Re: Nothing more to be said
Whoa. o.O That was, as Lauren said, beautifully written. Wow.
superdork11- Rising Star 1
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Re: Nothing more to be said
*snapplause* That was really beautiful. Usually attempted rhyming in poetry is suicide for the literature but you executed that marvelously.
Re: Nothing more to be said
*Agrees with Nadine*
superdork11- Rising Star 1
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Re: Nothing more to be said
*Agrees with Elieen agreeing with Nadine* That was beautiful. Sad, but just so... Amazing.
PeggySnow- Scholar 3
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Re: Nothing more to be said
Yes. *Agrees with Peggy* Not even gonna try the rest.
superdork11- Rising Star 1
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Re: Nothing more to be said
Thanks ladies/guys
And feel free to critique; I'm relatively knew at writing poems, so help would be...helpful xD
And feel free to critique; I'm relatively knew at writing poems, so help would be...helpful xD
BellatrixMalfoy- Novice 1
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Re: Nothing more to be said
I'd love to help but... Wow. I literally have nothing to say about this poem... Wow. I'd never guess you were a new poet. That's amazing...
Tolly12bells- Rising Star 2
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Re: Nothing more to be said
Yeah, I have really, nothing to critique it about.
superdork11- Rising Star 1
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Re: Nothing more to be said
Thanks That's really nice to hear. Does the rhyming seem forced to you all?
BellatrixMalfoy- Novice 1
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Re: Nothing more to be said
NEIN! Hah, no, it doesn't. It's really good.
superdork11- Rising Star 1
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Re: Nothing more to be said
No... Not at all. It flows very evenly.
Tolly12bells- Rising Star 2
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Re: Nothing more to be said
Yes, yes it does.
superdork11- Rising Star 1
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Creative Souls :: Writing :: Poetry
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