Mirt and the Numerous (A weird fairytale)

Allllllright.... Before I get into this... Well... Long story short: My electives class is "Fairytales" right now, and just recently, we had to compose a fairytale for the said class. Me and my friend Abi teamed up, and here is our result. And credit to Abi, because she typed this. So, now, ONWARD MY MINIONS! Yes, you should be very, very afraid. (The whole thing is 17 pages, so take your time reading this. xD) I apologize beforehand for any confusion, and typos. xD

Once upon a time, in a faraway land, there lived two farmers. One was known as Fred, Fred the Normal Guy. The other was referred to as Dwayne, Dwayne the Magical Banana. Fred the Normal Guy had three herds of purple flying unicorns.

The two had a ferocious rivalry. The rivalry dated so far in the past that nobody could remember what it was about.

After the command of,"Hoodle-hoodle ninnyhops!!!" Fred the Normal Guy's first herd of purple flying unicorns would descend menacingly upon Dwayne the Magical Banana's magical banana trees, where all of the helpless magical bananas thrived. After each purple flying unicorn had violently devoured three magical bananas from Dwayne's trees, they would return to Fred the Normal Guy's farm.

After the command of, "Pruny bananaton freak of nature precipitation!!!" Fred the Normal Guy's second herd of purple flying unicorns descended menacingly upon Dwayne the Magical Banana's magical banana trees, where all of the terrified magical bananas were hiding. After each purple flying unicorn had mischievously devoured three magical bananas, they would return to Fred the Normal Guy's farm.

After the command of, "Balaclava!!!" Fred the Normal Guy's third herd of purple flying unicorns would descend menacingly upon Dwayne the Magical Banana's magical banana trees where all the armored bananas waited in fear of the next attack. After each purple flying unicorn had blissfully devoured three magical bananas from Dwayne's trees, they would return to Fred the Normal Guy's farm.

One day, maybe it was a Tuesday, Dwayne the Magical Banana had had enough. He stormed over to Fred the Normal Guy's farm and pounded with a fury on Fred the Normal Guy's door.

Fred the Normal Guy pulled open the door, peeking his head out fearfully to what was waiting around the wood.

"What the bloomin' bunny rabbits is yo doin' on my lawn, boy?" Fred the Normal Guy exclaimed furiously. His southern accent added to the enormity of the situation.

"O mighty Fred the Normal Guy, dost thou lie so low?" Dwayne the Magical Banana crescendo's as he throwed his arms wildly in the air.

"What is yo mouth runnin' on now, sonny boy?" Fred the Normal Guy snorted, rolling his eyes.

"What dost thy mouth runneth on? Thou art far wealthier than I be'eth! I wisheth that thou's lavender, winged, pointy horses shall stopeth flying over onto my orchards of magical banana trees." Dwayne the Magical Banana screamed. And with a swish of his banana wand, which he magically procured from his banana suit. "Yopoopybananatacosareawesome!!! Can I haveth thou recipe?"

Fred the Normal Guy stared, open mouthed, as he reached for his stick, preparing to back away slowly brandishing it. But before he could begin his stick brandishing, Dwayne the Magical Banana spoke again.

Dwayne the Magical Banana, with a swish of his banana wand, which he magically procured from his banana suit again, shot a burst of blue-purple-red-turqoise-magenta-pink-yellow-green-orange shimmering lights across the room, where they alighted upon Fred the Normal Guy's algebra book.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! Not mah algebra book!!!" screamed Fred the Normal Guy, in panic.

"Thou hast received what thou hast requested!" Dwayne the Magical Banana laughed evilly. And with that, he chanted,
"Unga Unga Bananunga
Unga Unga Bananunga
I conjure thee, Mirt the Ninja
Unga Unga Bananunga"
There is a moment's pause while Dwayne the Magical Banana strokes his imaginary beard.
"To rid thou of Gilberto" he adds as an afterthought.

"GILBERTO A BLOOMIN' OOMPA LOOMPA?!" Fred the Normal guy exclaimed in disgust.

Just then, a figure began to rise from the back of the room. A tall, rather lanky looking thing, that Fred the Normal Guy took to be Gilberto, The-Math-Book-Character-That-Comes-To-Life. Gilberto The-Math-Book-Character-That-Comes-To-Life rose to his full height, which was about 11' 6", and turned to face Fred the Normal Guy. Dwayne the Magical Banana had mysteriously disappeared, and in his place was a... Fred the Normal Guy did a double-take, a ninja. Mirt the Ninja, to be exact.

"I AM Mirt the NINja, and I have COME to RID YOU OF GilBERTO the-MATH-BOOK-Character-That-COMES-TO-LIfe!" The ninja shouted in a high-pitched voice, putting emphasis on all the wrong syllables.

Fred the Normal Guy was speechless.

"Ah Shall durney to ze Lahnd Behond da Settig Sud." Gilberto The-Math-Book-Character-That-Comes-To-Life had a voice similar to that of Elmo, from Sesame Street. Gilberto The-Math-Book-Character-That-Comes-To-Life did 42.3 jumping jacks, smashed through the window with the palm of his hand, fully intending to jump out of it, when he walked calmly out the front door, heading toward the town.

Suddenly, Dwayne the Magical Banana was back, grinning his evil grin.

"You, Mirt the Ninja, must travel through the mystical land of the NOMMING Sevens, the Confused Eights, and the Defective Bat Tens. Then capture Gilberto The-Math-Book-Character-That-Comes-To-Life from the Land Beyond the Setting Sun, and come back to show this idioteth, Fredeth the Ordinary One--"

"The honkin' name is Fred the Normal Guy, BANANA FREAK!!!" Fred the Normal Guy barked.

Dwayne the Magical Banana continued on as if nothing had happened. "What the correct thing to do in this situationeth is, I wondereth."

"WAiT!!!" Mirt the Ninja shrieked, "WHAT has HAPPened To the NINES?!?!?!"

"Welleth, the sevens ate the nines..." Dwayne the Magical Banana trailed off.

Mirt the Ninja nodded, made a ninja noise, and leaped out through the broken window which Gilberto The-Math-Book-Character-That-Comes-To-Life had smashed.

Mirt the Ninja then headed out toward the Hill of Knowledge, beyond which, lay the lands of the NOMMING Sevens, the Confused Eights, and the Defective Bat Tens.

Mirt the Ninja passed over the hill and saw, to his sudden fear, clumps of NOMMING Sevens with fangs. They were all emitting a peculiar, "Ein! Ein! Ein!" sound every time their solitary foot hit the green, silky-smooth dirt.

Mirt the Ninja entered the land of the NOMMING Sevens with extreme caution. After all, the Sevens ate the Nines.

Mirt the Ninja was just starting to feel safe among the NOMMING Sevens, when he heard a cry of, "EIN! ZWEI! DREI! FIER! FüMF! NOM!!!" and saw a humongous herd of NOMMING Sevens bouncing in pursuit.

Mirt the Ninja ran for his life. Just then, he stepped in a purple, squishy, pothole and sank up to his knees.

"NOM!!! NOM!!! NOM!!!" Mirt the Ninja now had incentive to get out of the pothole.

Mirt the Ninja felt two pointy teeth sink into his shoulder as he struggled. The first NOMMING Seven had latched onto him.

With a final battle cry of, "OMMANOMNOM!!!" The rest of the NOMMING Sevens latched down Mirt the Ninja's arms. He was trapped.

Just then, Mirt the Ninja heard a shout of, "BEEP! BEEP! BUH-BEEP!" and saw a group of Artistic Fours, driving their Amount-2-Nothing Zeros, which pulled their buggies. The Amount-2-Nothing Zeros were the slaves of the Artistic Fours, because, after all, Zero as a number amounts to nothing.

The buggies had elaborate paint jobs, including four-leaf-clovers, rainbows, and up-turned horseshoes.

This momentarily distracted the NOMMING Sevens, and gave Mirt the Ninja just enough time to continue on his journey to the land of the Confused Eights.

The land of the Confused Eights proved rather easy to pass, seeing as the Confused Eights were, as their name applied, very confused. They often ran into each other, and barely noticed Mirt the Ninja passing through their territory.

The Confused Eights would move in a very strange fashion. The bottom circle, who seamed to be extremely hyperactive, would spring into the air, as if attempting to float on the clouds. Unfortunately, this attempt proved fraught. The bottom circle would in fact, launch the top circle as high, and far as circularly possible. When the bottom circle realized what he had done, he would rush to catch the top circle on his way down. Only to repeat the process time and time again. Because the bottom circles suffer from an extreme case of short-term memory loss.

The ground in the Land of the Confused Eights was dented, due to the number of time the bottom circle had missed the top circle and the top circle had crashed into the ground. The dented, smooth, red ground reflected the sunlight, like motionless pond.

Mirt the Ninja then passed over the borderline into a deserted, barren land. The color of the ground was hot pink and rocky, but there was no sign of life. Mirt the Ninja assumed this was the land of the Nines. Well, before the NOMMING Sevens got hungry, anyway.

Mirt the Ninja passed through this land without any incident.

Next, Mirt the Ninja ninja rolled over into the land of the Defective Bat Tens. He didn't know what to expect, were the inhabitants bats, or baseball bats? But before he could find the answer to this question, he rolled into a fetal position on the ground and covered his eyes in shock. Everything in this land was shiny. Mirt the Ninja looked around, speechless.

From out of nowhere, there came these creatures, half bat, half bat. They were flying around, repeating one word, over, and over, and over.

"Shiny! Shiny! Shiny!"

They seamed to be rather attracted to Mirt the Ninja's sword, which was shiny.

"Shiny! Shiny! Shiny!" the Defective Bat Tens repeated, louder this time, as they advanced as fast as their wings could propel them.

"SHINY! SHINY! SHINY!" the Defective Bat Tens had officially penetrated the sacred line: they had trespassed into Mirt the Ninja's personal bubble.

"ExCUSE me!" Mirt the Ninja screamed, "But YOU have inVADED my PERSONAL bubble!"

The Defective Bat Tens swarmed around Mirt the Ninja's waistline, where his ninja sword hung from his belt.

Mirt the Ninja had a sudden realization. The Defective Bat Tens were obsessed with shiny stuff. Mirt the Ninja hucked his sword as far as he could huck. He grunted like Venus Williams after a hard serve.

The Defective Bat Tens flapped off after Mirt the Ninja's shiny sword. Since the Land of the Defective Bat Tens had less of a gravitational pull than the rest of the world, Mirt the Ninja's sword flew straight until it was just a speck in the distance, being pursued by a flock of noisy objects.

Mirt the Ninja was now free to continue on his journey to the Land Beyond the Setting Sun.

Mirt the Ninja saw the sun setting, and headed toward it. He reached it by nightfall.

Mirt the Ninja decided to rest there for the night. When he woke up, his instinct told him to turn over and resume sleeping. Then he remembered the journey he was on, and sprang up as if lifted by a puppeteer.

In the Land Beyond the Setting Sun, there was no sun, seeing as it was "beyond the setting sun". Hence the name. The land was dark and gloomy. The trees were withered and black with ashes. The rocks were scattered helter-skelter for as far as the eye could see. The ground was a dark grayish black, and had a spiderweb of cracks, as though they were going to fall down any minute. Between the cracks, steam escaped, creating a foggy-mist that covered the ground like dry ice overflowing from a cauldron. Every now and then, a burst of lava would shoot up from one of the cracks like Old Faithful.

There was a large castle, which towered ominously over the Land of the Setting Sun. The castle was all black, with angular sides that weren't quite straight up. There were tall turrets with spikes and pokey things coming out of the sides. There was a winding path that led up to the castle, and bats circled overhead. Mirt the Ninja descided to call the castle the Ominous Castle.

It wasn't hard to spot Gilberto The-Math-Book-Character-That-Comes-To-Life. He was the only colorful thing in the Land Beyond the Setting Sun. He was glowing, as if he was one of those glow-in-the-dark wall stickers.

Gilberto The-Math-Book-Character-That-Comes-To-Life darted around the Land Beyond the Setting Sun as though he had lost something important, and was looking for it. Just then, he flitted off onto the path that led to the Ominous Castle at the top of the hill.

Since Mirt the Ninja's job was to capture Gilberto The-Math-Book-Character-That-Comes-To-Life, he followed Gilberto The-Math-Book-Character-That-Comes-To-Life until he was out of sight.

Gilberto The-Math-Book-Character-That-Comes-To-Life disappeared inside the Ominous Castle. Mirt the Ninja waited for a minute, then followed suit.

What he saw inside the Ominous Castle was as expected. The walls were black, crumbly, cinderblock. The hardwood floor was jet black, with a black fluffy rug on top. The floor looked like it was made out of the same trees that were covered with ash outside. On the wall, there were portraits, mostly done with black, gray, or white paints. The portraits were framed in gold.

From out of nowhere, there came a voice, talking as though who ever it was was disappointed, or put out.

"Oh. My. God. What is that??"

Mirt the Ninja went to investigate.

He found was quite a surprise, sitting on a black chaise longue... Mirt the Ninja didn't quite know what to make of it at first. There was a ginormous pouffy thing sitting there. When the pouffy thing stood up, he got a better view.

"Hi. My name is, like, Bobelina the Ballerina. What's, like, yours?" the pouffy thing uttered.

The pouffy thing was actually a woman, possibly in her mid 20's. She wore a pink, sleeveless top, and a puffy pink tutu. Her honey-blonde hair was curled into a cone on top of her head, and was adorned by a gold tiara.

"UMMmmmmmm..... MY name iS MIRT The NInja." said Mirt the Ninja.

"Mirt? What kind of a, like, name is that?"

"IT Is MY name. Have you SEEN GILBERTO The-MATH-Book-CharACTER-That-COMES-To-LIfe?"

"Oh, you mean, like, that weird, like, thing??" said Bobelina, pointing to Gilberto The-Math-Book-Character-That-Comes-To-Life, who was struggling to escape from the clutches of a collapsed filing cabinet.

"YEs. HE is GILBERTO The-MATH-Book-CharACTER-That-COMES-To-LIfe. I was sent OUT TO CAPture him." Mirt the Ninja reached out to grab Gilberto The-Math-Book-Character-That-Comes-To-Life, but was stopped.

"NO! Why, like, are you going to capture, like, him? What has he, like, done wrong?" Bobelina the Ballerina grabbed Mirt the Ninja's wrist, and wouldn't let go.

"WEll.... I, MIRT The NINja, DO not know. MY JOb is tO caPTURE, not to ASK QUEStions oF DWAYNE the MAGical BANANA's banana WANd...." Mirt the Ninja was just beginning to continue, when he was interrupted by Bobelina the Ballerina.

"WAIT! You've, like, lost me. Who is, like, Dwayne the Magical Banana? Like, what kind of a name is that?"

Bobelina looked extremely confused, so Mirt the Ninja explained to her all about Fred the Normal Guy, Dwayne the Magical Banana, Gilberto The-Math-Book-Character-That-Comes-To-Life, his mission to capture Gilberto The-Math-Book-Character-That-Comes-To-Life, his journey across the Land of the NOMMING Sevens, the Land of the Confused Eights, the deserted Land of the Nines, the Land of the Defective Bat Tens, and finally, how he found Bobelina the Ballerina.

"AND Then I FOUnd you and didN"T THINK THat you wERE a HUMAN." Mirt the Ninja finished his story in a very animated fashion.

"Wow, that's, like, totally awesome! Now, like, you must be totally, like, confuzzled about me and, like, my life story."

Before Mirt the Ninja could encourage Bobelina the Ballerina any further, she began her story like this:

"Well, like, I used to be the ultimate ruler of, like, the Democratic Republic Of The Numerous. Well, then, like, that was when the Violent Volcano, like, erupted. The Violent Volcano, like, drove most of the Numerous out of, like, the Land Beyond the Setting Sun."

Bobelina proceeded to tell Mirt the Ninja when the Violent Volcano erupted, the Numerous had no protection, so they fled. All of the numbers of the same kind created borders to signify their land, and pretty soon, the Democratic Republic of the Numerous had fallen to pieces. Now there was the Land of the NOMMING Sevens, the Land of the Artistic Fours, The Land of the Amount-to-Nothing Zero's, etc.

The Numerous numbers that stayed, were all dead. "The, like, Violent Volcano spewed lava all over, like the Democratic Republic of the Numerous. Everyone was, like, incinerated. The Ominous Castle was the only, like, thing spared. The hill saved us. The lava couldn't, like, climb up."

Bobelina the Ballerina then told Mirt the Ninja how the Democratic Republic of the Numerous used to be a fertile place, with green grass, and plenty of pomegranate trees, and multicolorful bushes, and clear blue skies with a few white, fluffy clouds.

When the Violent Volcano erupted, the blast was off centered. So it catapulted the Democratic Republic of the Numerous beyond the setting sun. There were no more Numerous, so it wasn't the Democratic Republic of the Numerous. It was renamed the Land Beyond the Setting Sun.

Bobelina the Ballerina then told Mirt the Ninja how she couldn't ever leave the Ominous Castle in the Democratic Republic of the Numerous.

"It has, like, been my home ever since I was, like, born."

"I'M SOrry, BOBelinA." Mirt the Ninja hugged Bobelina the Ballerina tightly, and Bobelina the Ballerina returned the hug. Mirt the Ninja noticed that she smelled of aniseed and mint. He found the smell strangely comforting.

When the two separated, Bobelina the Ballerina had tears in her eyes.

"That's, like, the first time I've seen anyone since, like, the Violent Volcano erupted." she choked out between her tears.

Mirt the Ninja hugged Bobelina the Ballerina again, as she sobbed into his shoulder. He wanted to comfort her, but knew his voice would make him sound silly and uncomforting. He settled with patting her back.

When Bobelina the Ballerina and Mirt the Ninja separated, Bobelina the Ballerina's eyes were red from crying.

It was then that they remembered Gilberto The-Math-Book-Character-That-Comes-To-Life. For the past 15 minutes, he had amused himself by turning backflips off of the back of the chaise longue. It was then that he missed, and instead of landing on the black fuzzy carpeting, flew out of the window, tipping the chaise longue onto its side.

Mirt the Ninja and Bobelina the Ballerina heard maniac laughter coming from outside the window.

"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!"

Gilberto The-Math-Book-Character-That-Comes-To-Life's laughter sounded similar to Snoopy's.

"Come on, Mirt!" Bobelina the Ballerina screamed, "Don't you, like, want to capture Gilberto The-Math-Book-Character-That-Comes-To-Life?"

Mirt the Ninja beamed. Dropping the job off of the end of a name and calling a person by only their birth name was a sign of the utmost affection and love.

"YEs I DO!!!" He screamed as Bobelina the Ballerina dashed out of the door. Mirt the Ninja quickly followed suit.

The two found that Gilberto The-Math-Book-Character-That-Comes-To-Life had fallen into a rhododendron bush, and was shaking the branches to make the flowers rain down on him, all the while maniacally laughing.

Bobelina the Ballerina and Mirt the Ninja crept toward Gilberto The-Math-Book-Character-That-Comes-To-Life. Gilberto The-Math-Book-Character-That-Comes-To-Life didn't see Mirt the Ninja and Bobelina the Ballerina coming toward him. He was to busy shaking rhododendron flowers onto himself.

All of a sudden, Gilberto The-Math-Book-Character-That-Comes-To-Life stopped shaking the rhododendron. He stood up, as though there was a board tied to his back. His eyes were wide, and he faced Bobelina the Ballerina with a look of complete disbelief.

Bobelina the Ballerina had raised her arms in the air, and Gilberto The-Math-Book-Character-That-Comes-To-Life followed her every move.

Gilberto The-Math-Book-Character-That-Comes-To-Life bowed low, and uttered, almost under his breath, "Ghereetinks shour bowloweenaniss." and stood up.

"WHaT just HAPPENed thERE?" Mirt the Ninja asked Bobelina the Ballerina.

"He used to, like, be one of the Numerous. He's, like, made up of math symbols, so, like, it makes sense. The Numerous have to always, like, obey me, because I am, like, their supreme ruler."

For ten seconds there was complete silence.

"YAY!!! WE'VE (like) CAPTURED GILBERTO THE-MATH-BOOK-CHARACTER-THAT-COMES-TO-LIFE!!!!" Bobelina the Ballerina and Mirt the Ninja yell at the same time, as they do the High School Musical jump. Then they looked at each other, and burst out laughing.

When they had recovered from their bout of unexpected laughter, they hugged each other.

The aniseed and mint smell filled Mirt the Ninja's nostrils, as Bobelina the Ballerina whispered in his ear, "We've done it, Mirt."

Mirt the Ninja had always thought that the idea of kissing was gross. Putting your mouth up to someone elses, eww! But ever since he met Bobelina the Ballerina, the idea had seemed more and more more appealing.

When they untangled themselves, Bobelina the Ballerina turned to Mirt the Ninja, and spoke some very unexpected words, "Now, it's, like, time for you to meet Joe."

Mirt was startled. He didn't know Bobelina had affections for anyone else. It was all he could do to blink back tears. He let go of her hand, and let his lifeless one drop to his side. He was staring at his toes when they began to blur. He didn't know how he could live through this. The It Ends Tonight lyrics were playing through his head.

"Oh," Bobelina the Ballerina was startled by Mirt the Ninja's reaction, "Not like that, Mirt. You are the one I love. Joe, like, is a dragon."

This cheered Mirt the Ninja up. His blurry feet vanished, replaced by his ordinary ones. He looked up at Bobelina the Ballerina, and a look of deepest relief spread across his face.

"WHEIPHF!" Bobelina the Ballerina let out a ear-splitting whistle, and then he appeared.

Joe the Dragon was a very large dragon. He was easily as big as an apartment building, he looked like one of the large dragons from Avatar. But his coloring was far more exciting. His scales were a brilliant turquoise, with tangerine orange polka dots, lime green stripes, and hot pink zig zags. His patterns blended together, to make an amazing tie-dye effect.

"GRAAE!" Joe the Dragon's call sounded like nine cats trapped inside of a metal dustbin.

Bobelina the Ballerina walked up to Joe the Dragon and stroked his nose-plate with care. Joe licked Bobelina the Ballerina on the nose, as Bobelina jumped on his back.

"Well, like, get on Mirt! We're gonna fly over to, like, Fred the Normal Guy's farm. Come on Gilberto The-Math-Book-Character-That-Comes-To-Life, you're, like, coming too!"

"HELlo jOE!" Mirt the Ninja greets Joe as he hops onto his back behind Bobelina.

"Sank ooh," Gilberto The-Math-Book-Character-That-Comes-To-Life said to Joe as he cartwheeled onto his back, behind Bobelina the Ballerina and Mirt the Ninja.

"Come on Joe, we can, like, do this. Now, just, like, start flying out past the setting sun." Bobelina the Ballerina talked to Joe in the tone of voice that Lauren and Abi talk to their computers when they won't start up.

Joe started flying. With powerful thrusts of his wings, he cleared the trees, then the Ominous Castle, then, finally, the clouds. At any given moment, Joe would soar up, or dive down, so Bobelina the Ballerina and Mirt the Ninja were hanging on with their full strength.

Gilberto The-Math-Book-Character-That-Comes-To-Life, however, wasn't paying any mind at all to where he was or what was happeing. He was too busy turning backward-flip-flops on Joe's back. It was then, that Joe dived. Gilberto The-Math-Book-Character-That-Comes-To-Life was in the middle of his 79th consecutive flip flop, when he was thrown in the air as Joe dived. He emitted a very terrified screach, "EEEEE!", and plunged down toward the shiny Land of the Defective Bat Tens.

Gilberto The-Math-Book-Character-That-Comes-To-Life was very lucky that Joe's tail was as long as it was. He just barely grabbed onto the tip of Joe's tail. As Joe flied, Gilberto The-Math-Book-Character-That-Comes-To-Life was trailing behind, like the final ribbon on the end of kite's tail.

"EEEEEE!" the kite's tail screached.

Below them, Mirt the Ninja saw all of the lands that he had passed through earlier. The Land of the Defective Bat Tens, the Land of the Nines, The Land of the Confused Eights, and finally, the Land of the NOMMING Sevens. Mirt the Ninja saw Fred the Normal Guy's farm in the distance.

Joe the Dragon gave a final screach, "GRAAE!" and descended to land in Fred the Normal Guy's courtyard.

But when Joe was still about 100 feet above the courtyard, Gilberto The-Math-Book-Character-That-Comes-To-Life murmured, "Kahtlycke" and let go of Joe's tail.

Gilberto The-Math-Book-Character-That-Comes-To-Life fell with his limbs outstreatched, like a sky diver.

Gilberto The-Math-Book-Character-That-Comes-To-Life was fully intending to land on all fours, like a cat, but instead, he went splat on Fred the Normal Guy's courtyard. Then he jumped up, and said with his arms outstreached, "Ahm ookey!"

When Joe landed, Mirt the Ninja and Bobelina the Ballerina jumped off of his back and were face to face with Fred the Normal Guy, who had been aroused from milking his purple flying unicorns by the commotion of Joe landing in his courtyard.

"Wot the freakin' raspberry cheesecake's are you doin' back here now, Mirt da Ninja? Y'all brought Gilberto The-Math-Book-Character-That-Comes-To-Life back to me, nows I can detroy him fer gude." Fred the Normal Guy reached out to grab Gilberto The-Math-Book-Character-That-Comes-To-Life, who was attempting to ride a purple flying unicorn, to no evail.

"NO!!!" Mirt the Ninja cried, throwing his body in front of Fred the Normal Guy, blocking his path to Gilberto The-Math-Book-Character-That-Comes-To-Life.

"Git out of mah way, Ninja man!! I's gonna drown that lil' booger into the well!"

"WHat has hE EVER DOne to YOU?"

"Wot has 'e done to me? Well, the mutant blueberry has destroyed mah algebra book, he's wreaked havoc on mah farm, and that's only the beginnin' of it!"

Bobelina the Ballerina had walked up to Fred the Normal Guy and put her manicured hand on his shoulder, "He's just, like, an innocent little thing. What, like, really destroyed you algebra book is your, like, rivalry and hatred for Dwayne the Magical Banana. If your conflict is, like, resolved and you learn to accept your differences, then, like, everything will return to how they were ment to be in the, like, first place." Bobelina the Ballerina said this in a voice that you would use to sooth an angry animal with.

"NEVER! I'm in a fight with the world but I'm winnin'" Fred the Normal Guy exclaimed, "Ninja man, you and your Princess friend can't stop me!" and with that, Fred the Normal Guy threw Bobelina the Ballerina onto the ground with all of his strength, which was quite a lot.

"AAHHH!"

"BOBELINA!!" Mirt the Ninja cried, running to where she lay, leaving Gilberto The-Math-Book-Character-That-Comes-To-Life unguarded.

As Fred the Normal Guy reached toward Gilberto The-Math-Book-Character-That-Comes-To-Life, a new figure came running into the courtyard.

"What hast thou doneth now?" Dwayne the Magical Banana called, having been attracted by all of the commotion.

"It's nothin' of mah fault!" Fred the Normal Guy addressed Dwayne the Magical Banana, "It's all of YOUR fault!"

"Thou cannot kicketh me down anymore, I'm already oneth the ground!" Dwayne the Magical Banana said.

Just then, Fred the Normal Guy remembered Bobelina the Ballerina's words, and realized how much his rivalry was costing him, and Dwayne the Magical Banana.

"I'm sorry, Dwayne the Magical Banana. Shouldn't we just accept that everyone is different and that everyone needs help?"

"Yes, we shouldeth."

"I'll tell my purple flying unicorns to stop going over to your magical banana farm every day to eat your magical bananas."

"Thanketh you."

"In fact, I'll buy all of the magical banana's that my unicorns will eat from now on."

"Why, thank thou."

Then the two heard a song, a beautiful song, that made their heads turn toward the sound.

"Tonight I've fallen and I can't get up, I need your loving hands to come and pick me up."

It was Bobelina the Ballerina, singing to Mirt the Ninja. They held each other at arms length, and looked at each other lovingly.

"I remember the times we spent together all those flies, we had a million questions. All about our lives. And when we got to Fred the Normal Guy's farm, everything felt right. I remember the days we spent together, were not enough, it used to feel like dreaming except we always woke up."

Mirt the Ninja looked at Bobelina the Ballerina, and hugged her close to him.

"Tonight I've fallen and I can't get up, I need your loving hands to come and pick me up."

"WHen darkNESS TURNs to liGHT."

It was then they kissed.


They all lived happily ever after.

The End.

There you have it.

I've already read it, but it's still epic!

Lol, and for reference, children, for those of you who didn't catch on, the two songs we're referencing at the end are:
Tonight -- FM Static
It Ends Tonight -- The All-American Rejects

Another question, what's up with all love songs being at night? We've got a midnight train (Don't Stop Believin'), midnight sun (Faithfully), lying beside you here in the dark (Open Arms), (It Ends Tonight), (Tonight), tonight will be the night that I will fall for you (Fall For You)... Keep listing them if you can. But it's ridiculous!

Yeah, I know!

I guess... night is just a more romantic time? xD

Yeah....

Lauren, I was bursting out laughing every few seconds. xDD That, was an epic story. *applause*

Yeah, I guess night is just more romantic because of the stars and all that.

Oh yes. It is an epic story. *joins in applause*

Hehe... Stars... Sorry....

A fair amount of credit goes to Abi, too. I'll tell her you liked it, Nadine.

It's sort of interesting though... xD

Okay! (:

Yeah, loll.

Yeah.

Yeah, it is...