♥ Crusher's Club II ♥

We talk, and we're both like, "I'm so sorry. I was stupid." xD

Why, thank you. xD It was just so sweet! I wanted to tackle hug him!

xDD

That is so sweet! I would want to tackle-hug him, too. xDD

It was actually sorta sweet. "Well, it just seemed like you didn't want to be around me, so I pretended to not want to be around you..." "Oh, god, you mean I've made you sad by not spending time with you? (Stupid, stupid, STUPID me!)" "Well, sorta but, it seemed like... Oh god, I've been stupid, too." XD

I'm shocked, because it's like no time passed at all. He's still the same charming, witty, weird kid I fell for three years ago.

Aww, that's sweet. xD

Someone put that on a T-shirt. xD OR, or, an avatar or signature. HEY! When I get photoshop probably this weekend when I get my new latop, I'll make you a signature or something. And put cute quotes like that on it.

Hehehe, it was so awkward at the time, though. xD

Okay... I didn't actually think that was that cute...

xDD

Well, I thought it was. You've said cuter things about him, but still.

Er, thanks... xD ... What have I said about him that's cuter...?

I'm playing around on photobucket, in hopes of changing my billboard. Whatever it's loading clearly isn't going to come up, and I think the butterflies are tired. xD

I don't remember. xD But I remember several times when you said something about him and I went AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWw. Like that. xD

xDD And that apple will go rotten once school starts, eh?

Ohh... xD I remember that, too, but I don't remember what I said.

Yeah, probably. xD Then I get to replace it with something else. Probably a Don't Stop Believin' graphic.

Yeah..

xD To match your avatar! Oh, how I love your avatar.

I love it too. I realized a little while ago, that in the entire time I've been on WR/WD/CS, it's been the same. I've never changed it. xD

xD I know, right? I don't know what I would do if you did change it. I would be like, who is this?!!! Oh... it's Lauren.. what? xD

Lol, nice. I've just finished making a new signature. I need another DSB one. xD I'm about to animate it, then put it up.

Cool!

Thanks. xD *yaaaaaawwwwwwwnnn and reeaaaaachh....* I should go to bed. I'm tired, and have to be up at about 8 tomorrow. So adieu for now! If it wouldn't be weird, tell AJ I say hi! xD

Speaking of which, how is he?

xD Nah, I don't think I will tell him, because as far as he knows I lost my phone and that's the reason I'm not texting him back.
I don't think I mentioned... I've fallen out of love with him. Everything he does seems embarrassing or annoying or gay, which is EXACTLY what happened with Ricky. So, I think I'm going to break up with him... but he's so fricking in love with me and it's going to kill him...
Three lessons I've learned recently: I'm naiive with my heart. I can't trust myself. I don't look before I fall.

I guess I was lying about going to bed. I'm not tired now... Uh-oh. xP Thaaaat's a problem. I think that's just one of the hazards of falling for your best friend. The weird little quirks that you love when you're just friends with a person drive you insane once you spend that much time around them. That's one of the reasons I could never date Josh. I know he'd annoy the crap out of me. xP Okay... Once again, this is beyond my level of experience. I don't know how to go about the whole breaking up thing, so... best of luck to you.

*Sigh* Well, that was a little depressing. The only thing is, I think your heart operates on it's own accord. It's not your fault that your heart decided that it fancied somebody, then sent some signal up to your brain to fall. Your heart tripped you! Naughty heart! xP And Nadine, no, no, NO, no, NO. You've got to trust yourself, otherwise you'll never come around to being able to trust others.

Yay! More roleplay and discussion about my messed up love life! xD Yeah... I'm just an idiot... I seriously need to take a break from guys. Like, REALLY. Now, I promised myself I wouldn't say this, because it makes it more real, but I might have a teensy tiny itty bitty major crush on Sam. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. Someone lock my heart up in a cage. It's out of control.

LOL, "Naughty heart!" xP Well, mainly I can't trust myself with guys. That's the real problem. I can trust myself otherwise. Mostly. I think.

No, you're not an idiot. Bad. *hits on head with stick* Yes. I will do that again if you bring yourself down. Nadine, you're an amazing person, and just because you haven't found the right guy yet, then don't worry! You're 13 years old! You've still got your whole life ahead of you! And consider it: The three boys I know you've gone out with, I know that you were very happy with them for a time. Just because you're not now doesn't mean you'll never be in the future. I have a suggestion, though. If you have a mini crush on Sam, wait to see if it gets bigger, and give it some time before asking him out. You don't have to have a boyfriend, but that doesn't mean you have to take a break from boys, either. (And about your heart in a cage, I just got a totally bizarre visual of a heart smashing sky scrapers, and news reporters being like, "And Nadine's heart is on the move! Headed right towards downtown New York." xD I'm sorry, I'm not helping, but it's just funny... xD)

Sorry... I got... a little... carried away. xD Just give it time. Wait for a few months, and see if the crush fades away. If it's still there after about 2 or 3 months, then I'd say give it a shot.

I know. I'm not looking for my soul mate at this age, but I. Am. Way. Boy. Crazy. And. It. Is. A. Major. Problem. Because. I. Am. A. Heartbreaker. D: Yeah, I'm not about to ask him out or take any further action. I don't know him that well, yet, and I have to get to know him better for sure. I doubt he would ever want to date me, but you know, IDK. I certainly wouldn't break up with AJ for him because I am positive he doesn't like me in any more than a friendship way, and we're not that close friends anyway. But we'll see... LOL, omg, that made me crack up. I love you. xD

xDD It made me laugh. Yeah, but the main issue is that I keep breaking people's hearts and I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHY THE HELL THEY LOVE ME IN THE FIRST PLACE, sorry for the caps but it really is completely beyond me. I mean, like, take someone like Sam, for example, who should be the most popular boy on the face of the earth who all girls love and he's never had a girlfriend. And then me, the nameless scene girl in the back of the class, has had three boyfriends, four if you count Brandon twice, and we're not even in high school yet! What?!! It doesn't make any sense!

But it's not as if you're a heartbreaker on purpose! I think, this is going to sound mean, and I'm sorry, but I think you might be overreacting to mini crushes, a little... And about Sam, you can never be sure. Who knows what might happen in the future? Love you, too. xD And here's something to boost your self-esteem levels. It just made my day: Here's What You Are

Glad to help. Nadine, who knows why they love you? If you really love somebody, you can't explain why. Well, sometimes that's why people like you. You're not all up in everyone's business, and you're doing your own thing. You don't really care what people think. And hey, about having three boyfriends, there's somebody in my class who's had 8. We just finished 7th grade. Three isn't bad. xD Nearly all the kids in my grade have had at least that many.

I know, but I feel guilty anyway. xP Yeah, maybe, and no offense taken. I need to hear it. Yeah, I just don't know... my life is.. weird. Haha that's awesome (: I think the word beautiful has lost meaning to me because I hear it so damn much... I wish they would shut up and stop telling me I'm beautiful all the time because it's beginning to mean less and less to me. =(

Gah, I just can't see the worth in myself, I suppose. LOL, seriously? Wow...

Well, you know, life isn't easy, and sometimes, you just have to roll with the punches a little bit more. ... And make sure you have some tissues for when life bops you in the face and gives you a bloody nose. I can see what you mean about it getting less and less special. Like, for me, being called beautiful is something that's never happened in my life, by anybody. So if someone were to call me beautiful, in RL, I mean, it would mean SO much, because I never get it. But it's sorta like the novelty of it wears off after a little while. To a point where it'd almost be more satisfying to get a "lovely" or "pretty" instead of "gorgeous" or "beautiful." Just because it's different, and shows that whoever's saying it isn't just sinking into routine.

It's hard to see the worth in yourself, which is why you go to other people, who will SHOW you it. Yeah, I'm not kidding. It's crazy. Sixth grade was especially bad. People are starting to figure it out. xD

That's a good metaphor. Someone put that on a T-shirt. xD Yeah, exactly. It's getting to the point where "I love you" is losing meaning too because I've said it and heard it and not meant it and now it just feels like empty words and I hate that and it makes me want to cry. I've already screwed up love for myself.

They tell me all they want how amazing I apparently am but after a while the meaning becomes lost because I hear it too much... this is a reoccuring problem. You know what I need? A boyfriend to just have fun with, and do weird things, and goof off, and kiss sometimes but not always, and not be complimenting me constantly and not say "I love you" until we're sure we mean it. THAT is what I need. That's the perfect boyfriend for me. Speaking of, how would you describe your perfect man?
Wow. That's insane.. xP

Thank you. xD I should just start a T-shirt company. You and me. And we'll put all these metaphors and stuff on them. That was sad... I don't know if this will help, but maybe cutting "I love you" from your vocabulary entirely will help here. Because eventually when you say it again, the original giddy, happy, floating sense will come back, but it'll take time. And you haven't screwed up love for yourself, you've just worn it out. Love had already run quite the marathon by the time it made it to you, and then you made it run some more. Just give love some time to catch it's breath, and maybe eat something and rest it's legs a little, then you can try it again.

Ooh, I think we've played the describe your perfect man game before! I'm gonna try again: I definitely need whoever my boyfriend is to just be a little laid back, and not so stressed out about everything, because he's gonna have to be able to calm me down when I am. Somebody weird, who doesn't mind my clumsiness... Someone who never takes the little things for granted, and will understand when I spaz out over something like a marble. And, this is gonna sound odd, somebody who struggles to express their exact feelings for me, that way I know that on the occasion that they compliment me, they really mean it, and that they wanted to say it enough that they got over themselves, and spat it out. A good hugger, for sure. Somebody who will just sit, and put their hand on my shoulder until I'm not upset anymore. Someone who isn't afraid to cry, and will just let me hold them and try to make it better... Ooh, someone I can spot in a crowd so that I don't have to spend ages looking for them... Somebody who respects my space bubble until I decide that they've cleared the chemical scan and can come in... (I have a space issue...) And someone who just understands that no, I'm not perfect, and yes, we are going to disagree, but somebody who promises that through all the fighting that might take place, they'll never let go.
I know, right? xP